Tips for parents: What to Do When Your Child Refuses Therapy?

January 30, 2025

When your child refuses therapy, it can be a challenging and emotional situation for parents. Whether it’s for mental health, behavioral issues, or developmental concerns, therapy can play a crucial role in helping children overcome obstacles and thrive. However, it's not uncommon for children to resist or refuse to attend therapy, which can leave parents feeling frustrated and unsure of how to proceed. Understanding the reasons behind this resistance and taking thoughtful steps to address it can make a significant difference. Here are some tips for parents to navigate this difficult situation and help their child feel more comfortable and open to the therapeutic process.

1. Understand Their Concerns 

Spend time talking to your child about why they are reluctant. They might feel scared, anxious, or simply  confused about what therapy involves. Ask open-ended questions and listen without judgment. For instance,  "Can you tell me what makes you uncomfortable about therapy?" This can help them feel heard and  understood. 

2. Educate Them About Therapy 

Explain therapy in simple, relatable terms. Let them know it's a place where they can talk about their  feelings and get help with whatever is troubling them. Use analogies they understand, like how a tutor helps  with schoolwork, a therapist helps with emotions and feelings. 

3. Find the Right Therapist 

Choosing a child therapist who specializes in working with children and has a warm, engaging personality can  make a huge difference. Sometimes, having a therapist of a certain gender or age can make the child feel  more comfortable. It's crucial to involve your child in this process if possible, to make them feel more in  control. 

4. Normalize Therapy 

Frame therapy as a common and helpful tool. You could mention how athletes have coaches, and even the  best musicians have teachers. Share stories (if appropriate) of others who have benefited from therapy. 

5. Create a Comfortable Environment 

Ensure the therapy environment is friendly and welcoming. Sometimes, the clinic’s setting can be  intimidating. Many therapists offer initial sessions via video calls, which might feel less threatening than an  in-person meeting. 

6. Introduce Therapy Gradually 

Starting with shorter sessions can help. Or, you might begin with a joint session where you both meet the  therapist together, then gradually transition to the child attending alone. This step-by-step approach can  make the process seem less daunting. 

7. Use Positive Reinforcement 

Offer praise and small rewards for attending sessions. Positive reinforcement can encourage a more willing  attitude. Rewards can be as simple as extra playtime, a favourite snack, or a special outing. 

8. Model Positive Behaviour

If you’ve ever seen a therapist yourself, share your own experiences in a positive light. This can help  demystify the process and show that it’s okay to seek help. 

9. Utilize Creative Outlets 

Sometimes, traditional talk therapy might not be appealing. Consider therapies that incorporate play, art, or  music. These can be less intimidating and more engaging for children. 

10. Respect Their Pace 

It's important not to force your child into therapy. Instead, encourage them to try it for a few sessions and see  how they feel. Sometimes, just starting the conversation can be a significant first step. 

11. Seek Professional Guidance 

If your child’s resistance to therapy persists, consider consulting with a child psychologist or psychiatrist for  further advice. They might provide strategies tailored to your child's specific needs. 

12. Support Them at Home 

Create a supportive home environment where your child feels safe to express their feelings. Practice active  listening, and validate their emotions. This foundation of trust can significantly impact their willingness to  participate in therapy. 

Conclusion: 

Child therapy is a journey, and it's normal to encounter some resistance along the way. By approaching the  situation with understanding, patience, and creativity, you can help your child feel more comfortable and  eventually see the benefits of therapy.

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